Thursday, August 31, 2017

I'm not moving anywhere.

Did you move on?
From what?
Did you move on from being sad about Larry. Are you ready to move on to bigger and brighter things? Are you ready to get back on the horse?

I basked, briefly, in the ambiance of her stupidity.

Moving on isn't something you do.
It's something that happens, organically.
If it happened any other way, I'd be eternally weighed down by grief.

He was, is and forever will be my biggest and brightest thing.

I didn't add cowboy boots to my AliExpress wishlist for the purpose of riding a horse.

Sometimes people are stupid.

Saturday, August 26, 2017

Spring is coming!

The days are getting better. Spring is a week away!
Out and about today with a few of the tamafreakies.

It's a fabulous day today Hawkes Bay.
Didn't stop us from coming straight home to Netflix n chill.
You can't go anywhere with a baby. He cried all the way into town and all the way home. When we got home he smiled and cooed and all that cute crap.

Thursday, August 24, 2017

24 on the 24th.

Hard to swallow, but she's 24 today.
Still acts like a baby.

Happy Bursday edda big girl.
I was going to do a longer post, but I didn't feel like it .. besides, I spent the day with you.
That's enough Donkey, that's enough.

And then there were these yummos.

And finally, Bebs had a rough day on Tylers birthday.

Sunday, August 20, 2017

Avi's passport photos.

It took four of us to get her facing the right way.
The NZ Passport online photo checker denied all except the last one ...
Her eyes weren't facing forward in this one and her head was rotated more than 10°.

She was tilting her head in this one and they claimed her mouth was open.

But they said yes to the one where she's about to make fart noises with her mouth.

She will be the cutest thing on the plane.

Friday, August 18, 2017

Happy Anniversary Baybay

17 of forever.
Still remember a hot day in So.Cal, driving to the Notary and hitting KooKoo Roo afterwards for a two-person reception.
Best wedding ever.

I'll admit .. I forgot this year. I was standing in the supermarket earlier today looking at a red velvet cake. Something was telling me that I should get it because there was a good reason for it, but I didn't remember until we got home and Hubs asked what the date was for todays journal entry.

It was actually yesterday on the 17th, but it's still the 17th somewhere in the USA right now.

Miss you mucho.

Monday, August 14, 2017

Saturday, August 12, 2017

I'll be glad when winter is over.

You wouldn't think life here is busy, but it is and I only have one kid to deal with. No .. I changed my mind, there are three of them that I actually deal with and 1/3 is the mother to 3/3.

The year didn't start off that great, but by August it's transitioned into something that will be quite unforgettable when I look back on 2017.

Finally got an office. It's been a long time coming, but once 1/3 moved out I quickly moved into beastmode and set up office before she decided she was coming back. I'd take a photo of it .. but then the people of Hickville would know what I had and know where to go when they need something. I get lots of visits for 'somethings' and very rarely get visits from people who are genuinely concerned about my well being.

I'm 40 soon. I want to be able to look back from 40 and see that I've accomplished something grand. I can live with being the widow stuck in Hicksville as long as there is something else to go with it. I have less than 2 years to find that something.

Kudos to Miss Maia for the Hubs spam.

And finally .. the boy has learned to jump.

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Life is a moment in space .. When the dream is gone .. It's a lonelier place

Every dream I have of Larry involves a phone. Usually what happens is that I'm trying to ring him and I know he's there, but he can't answer for some reason.

He answered in last nights dream. FaceTime'd infact. He was driving through green mountains and told me the place was great and that I'd love it there. At some point in my dream I believed he was really there. Alive. Then in and out of dreamland I realized he was still gone and I would wake up without him. In bed, and half asleep, I felt myself make the face a baby makes just before they're about to cry.

It's moments like these that I'm happy to wake up to the important people in my life.

Shaily is 18 tomorrow. We already celebrated her birthday on Saturday.

The Arabs are in town. We had a spicy noodle challenge at the marae after we put them all to work stacking the mattresses into a container. The prize was a Memphis Meltdown. Maia won the first one and Jeston and Shaily had three tiebreakers where they had to eat more noodles. 4 cups later and looking like she'd had a Kylie Jenner lip plumping episode, she gave up and let her brother win, not before being a total sore loser by telling him she'd buy her own Memphis Meltdown tomorrow.

Then we lit a fire at the back.

And got all serious about cameras.

Thursday, August 3, 2017

It's OK to hate your kids sometimes.

My child will be 7 in 30 days. Lately I've wanted to give her away to someone who might like her when she does annoying things. She has this habit of stuffing her mouth with food. She told me once it's because she thinks someone is going to take the food before she gets to eat it all. I explained to her that this doesn't happen in our house and she doesn't need to be that revolting at the table.

Tonight she did it. Stuffed her pie hole with a piece of bread that she'd saturated with bacon hock soup. She sat there and looked at me about ready to vomit. I kept eating my dinner, sat back and observed, waiting for her next move.

Now I'm not being anal or mean .. but if I let her drink something before dinner, she'll want to drink more drink after a few spoonfuls of her meal then suddenly she'll be full on liquids and still have an 80% full dinner plate then she'll tell me she's done AND THEN at 2am, she'll want a sandwich. Happens all the time. 2am. I don't let her drink before she eats. She has to eat at least half before she can quench her thirst.

Countdown has a new brand of sugar-free soda pop called Fizz and it's $1 a bottle. The lime flavor graced our table tonight at dinner time. Her cup waited for her and I think she thought it was going to disappear before she could finish her dinner and so we find ourselves with a mouthful of bread about ready to burst.

And then she gagged.
And gagged.
And gagged.

15 minutes later. Looking me dead in the eyes, she opened her mouth and out spilled one piece of bread saturated in bacon hock soup .. in liquid form. I'm dry heaving as I type this.

I imagined myself flying across the table and bouncing her head off of it, but as I sipped my lime soda pop, I told her to go spit it out, go brush her teeth and go straight to bed.

That was at 5:45pm.
At 6:30pm I hear from her bedroom.

You're mean.
Why because I sent you to bed because you were disgusting during dinner time?
Why? Because I didn't let you have fizz?
Then why?

I love you, but you annoy me so much that I want to drink vodka.

Summer part 2

Nessa envisioned this shoot with my nephew Ellis. They pulled it all together very well. Hubs was supposed to be in it, but got stage fright...