AMAORICAN

The Boy Love. The Girl Love. TyJay & his Gramps. FHE last night. Closing song, "I love to see the Temple". Not sure what the actions were. Woke up to a great sunrise this morning that lit up the entire kitchen and lounge with orange light. Hubs & TyJay chats before school. Then she left. He is very cute, but we will enjoy our night without him. His dulcet tones in the middle of the night will not be missed tonight. Her "Under the sea" diorama from last term. She wanted to send it to Ariel, but there aren't enough 'Fragile' stickers in the world for that postal service. Great sunset to end the day.

I've had a rough week, but I'm the brave face of the family and I'm supposed to keep it together. Nothing in particular happened, but a shoulder to lean on would have been helpful. Not just anyone's shoulder, Larry's shoulder. He's who I fret for when I have these kinds of weeks and it's been a while since the last one so it's an improvement just as much as it's a setback. Decided earlier tonight that I'm taking the day off of religion. Its instill ed in me that it's the place to be when you're feeling low, but even God rested and I want to rest away from everyone. There is no fix for what I am feeling this week. It's a sadness with an age of 5 years that lays dormant for the most part. It reappears infrequently. Like this week.

My sisters first born is 9 today. Not kidding when I say that at 9 years old, she's one of the biggest jackasses I've ever known. Her two brothers are in second and third place. Love you long time Larellyphants. See you next weekend.

One of the speakers in church today spoke on judging. Welcome to every ward in the LDS Religion. You try not to, but always inevitably fail. I had an epiphany during her talk today and came to a conclusion. In order for me not to judge some of the people in my ward, I must have less to do with them because some of them are so awesome that it just can't be helped and leaves you thinking .. what in the holy F'ery. I am just being human. The church is true Internets. I continue to believe that if anything is amiss in it, it's the people.

Tyler. I'd like Hubba to go there for a year for the experience .. you know, before she starts Med school. Also their grad photo. Looks like a 10 year old next to Amazonians.

Aunty Vi was 57 on the 9th - she is the same age as my Mum, her sister, until next month. My brother Reid turned 40 on the 13th - he is the same age as my brother The Livian until July. Waimea was 14 on the 14th - his sister Coral is 15 today. They shared two days together the same age. Tonight we celebrated 4/6 birthdays. It was much needed after the news of the day. I gave Waimea my old Canon 40D for his birthday. Out of all my nieces and nephews, he's the most incline to actually learn something about photography and not just aim it at himself .. like the rest do. He's an artsy type. Eventually, I will upgrade my DSLR, but at the moment it is not a priority. I gave Coral socks, girly things, deodorant and body lotion. She felt very ripped off after spending an hour not believing Waimea's gift was for reals.

And the Lady of the House is already trying to tell me to take her back to her own house. The Tyler's are away for the night and I needed my Avi dose. She hasn't stayed over for weeks! Maybe months ... At 16 months, she is still delicious. Also learned a new word.   Sh#t.  Said it during closing prayer at FHE last week as well as hurry up.

I'm sick. Flu. Hubs n Avis. Our blue eyed boy's eyes haven't changed color yet. Currently 9 weeks old. Very naughty. Nice Nessa.

May marks being home for eight years. My Mum asked me if I thought it was a good move and I know it was. The last eight years have been the best of my life. I made lots of memories in the USA in 9 years and they were great memories, but I grew up in the last eight years. I saw death twice in the people I love. I became a widow. I overcame becoming a widow. I learned to trust a God who I wasn't 100% sure was even there. I learned how to mother a little soul who looked at me with willingness in her eyes. I found a love for my family when I thought I loved them enough already. I witnessed pure love from my Parents. I found protection in the arms of my brothers. I discovered exactly what my sister was made of, which validated her strength. I found my best friends have been here the whole time. I filled the space in my heart with them. I found my own. Day 1628.

My computer has had a virus .. all because my Mum likes to click ads that look interesting. Eg. See what this woman did to lose 50kg in 30 days. Somehow she wound up at a page selling toys for adults and the site had sounds and everything . All that equals a virus. Decided to do something about it last week. My Mum still thinks the computer is broken. Tyler got tattoos. Our boy has been with us for 2 months. He still cries like a mofo all the time , but he also likes to coo and smile. Indy is 6 weeks old now. Avi is an animal, but I love her the most. The Boy in his hunting gears from Nanny Mitch. Avis. 2 months old. Can't fit in the sink anymore. Chats with Aunty Hubs. At Shani's. Today.