I was privy to a group conversation last night that started as plans for a group lunch between a few friends. I don't know why I was in the conversation. I'd never go. Just as I was about to remove myself from the group, which would have no doubt resulted in becoming the topic of the conversation, a comment sparked my interest and stopped me in my tracks.
The discussion turned from picking a venue to complaints about husbands. Where I understand that simply going out for lunch once in a while with a bunch of girlfriends is due to a woman with children, detailing the attitude of your husband when he says it's not the best time to do that leaves a taste of disrespect on the tongue.
I read for a bit longer before the f-bombs began to circulate in my head and quickly released myself from the convo.
Seriously, if you're unhappy at the fact that your husband said no to lunch with your girlfriends because you don't have a babysitter, then you're an imbecile. If you stop talking to him because Friday wasn't a good day for him, then you're an imbecile and if you spread the word to your girlfriends the fact that your husband's an imbecile for not letting you go to lunch, then you're an even bigger imbecile.
You learn quickly to appreciate something when you've lost it and it's something I wouldn't wish even upon an imbecile.
There's a 5 year old who won't sleep in her own room laying next to me in bed every night in the spot my husband should be. When I wake up she's still there, where he should be. I don't talk to his photos in the house because I know he won't talk back, so I just smile at them now and again. My Friday lunches have been with women in my life who offer positive support and love, and this is limited to my sisters and Nina, and they suffice in the place of my husband. My dates are seeing children's movies and the intimacy of touching hands when you and your husband reach for the popcorn at the same time has become eating spilled popcorn from the ground handed to you with little sticking hands.
Don't degrade your husband over a Cafe lunch date, because a gourmet spinach quiche is not going to matter when you have no one to degrade anymore.
I'm taking a day to feel sorry for myself for having no husband. This is why summer was unpleasant.
We are all impatiently awaiting our new baby.
It's time for her Uncle Larry, Pop Tori and the Aunties to let go of her hand and let her come to us. They've had her long enough, it's our turn.
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