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You're a part of the rebel alliance and a traitor. Take her away!

On Monday the child poured powder all over the floor in her bedroom. When she walked out of the room, unaware that there was powder all over her hair and face, I asked what she'd been doing. She said Oh nothing and sat down on the couch like an innocent.

On Tuesday we were at The Parental's house and the child disappears down the hallway. She tells me she's washing her hands. 10 minutes later she's still washing her hands. I tell her that's enough time spent washing her hands and she runs out of the house and comes back 5 minutes later. I smell a scent on her and I know it's my Mum's lotion and I know it's the lotion she got only days earlier.

Have you been touching Nan's cream?
No. Not me.
I can smell it on you. Where is it?
I can't remember.

I make her sit on the couch for 20 minutes until she remembers. After 20 minutes of sobbing I asked her if she used up all Nan's cream.

Yes. Then I threw it in the rubbish at Ma's.
Is it all gone?
All of it?
Where did you use that much cream?
On the walls.

Wednesday. Sitting at home after a few hours of school. She tells me she's going into her bedroom to 'study'. She's never told me that before I didn't even know she knew what the word was. 10 minutes later she walks out of the room with cream in her hair and sits on the same couch and smiles back at me.

If I go into the room am I going to see a mess?
No. I did my study. There's no mess.
So if I get up right now and go into the room, I'm not going to see a mess?

No reply.
I get up and she follows me in. There on the dresser and the mirror are thick vitamin E lotion hand prints .. everywhere.

This morning. I get out of bed and walk into the kitchen. I grab her cereal from the fridge and get milk. It was a new box of milo cereal, we snuck it into Nan's trolley yesterday. I rip open the top and turn to throw something in the trash.
I scream and drop an F-Bomb.

Need Jesus and it's not even Friday.


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