Friday, September 17, 2010

Imagine it.

Imagine not hearing him call out to you in the middle of the night for help.
Imagine not being woken to noises of pain.
Imagine not seeing him hug the walls just to make it down the hallway.
Imagine not seeing him sitting inches away from the TV because he can't see.
Imagine not hearing him tell you I love you.
Imagine not seeing him walking in circles reaching out to find you.
Imagine not leading him through the grocery store.
Imagine not staying awake all night just to make sure he's still breathing.
Imagine not hearing him struggle to breathe at night.
Imagine not hearing his pleas to God in prayer for relief.
Imagine not being scared that today is the day it all goes away.
Imagine not hearing him tell you "that meal was interesting, I'll fore go seconds".
Imagine not seeing him next to you when you drive somewhere.
Imagine not comforting him.
Imagine not having to keep it together for him.
Imagine not hearing him talking loudly at 3am on Skype.
Imagine not hearing him laugh.
Imagine not hearing him sing two notes off key.
Imagine not waking up to him in the mornings.
Imagine not receiving emails from him saying "I love you again today" even though he's in the same room.
Imagine not seeing him smile.
Imagine not having dinner together.
Imagine not hearing him cry anymore from pain and exhaustion.
Imagine not hearing him snore louder than a fork in a blender.
Imagine not hearing him apologize for being sick and taking up my time.

Imagine him not there anymore.
I don't need to do that to know that I appreciate him.

The cons outweigh the pros, but I'll run in a heartbeat to his every beck and call if it means another moment in time with him.

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